Spit Out The Mushy Peas!

Masterchef Kennedy cooks up a grand ol’ Sunday roast including a firm lookin’ chicken breast, some nicely roasted potatoes, mash, yorkshire puds and, of course mushy peas. That lot seems all kinds of innocent doesn’t it?

As you can imagine from the clever literary style of the preceeding blather, all was not gravy (ahhh pun-tastic!). Cue the lightning storm and heavy downpour.

A fork-full of mash. Nom nom nom. The master enjoys, before popping back through to the kitchen for some salt.

Then, after some grinding the flavour seemed somewhat more acceptable to his toffee-nosed palate.

Before delving in to his prized roast potatoes, or the ever exciting yorkshire puds a mouthful of the token green-stuff – the mushy peas. Fresh from the tin they plummeted in to the microwave, from whence they were scooped on to the plate.

The moment the jaws of the beast were closed around the lucid-green of those peas, a burning sensation began to take over. It rose from within, engulfing his mouth. What to do?

Faced with the options of either spitting the peas out all over the newly cleaned table cloth, he decided to put Plan B in to action. That moment of dire straights clouded his judgement as the action of swallowing the boiling lava commenced. Soon the mouth would be free of the agony. But no.

The pain of just a moment ago was to look inferior to what was now occurring inside the very throat of the poor man. Agony ensued.

Rushing to the kitchen, cold water gushed in to a glass. But it wasn’t enough. Through to the utility room, where the freezer was spied. Iced lollies, three were eaten. Then for hours later silence. Sore throat and an inability to speak.

Do This And Be Good

I suppose at this point I should really make some kind of tenuous link to a business or persuasion lesson. Tenuous you asked for, and tenuous you shall receive.

Why did I put myself through this? Yes, this is an absolutely true story. I’m sitting here writing this right now, unable to speak (no trying to call me for a laugh, ok you sadist buggers!).

The options were either to literally spit the peas all over the table in front of me, or swallow them. Remember my attention was focused on getting this boiling hot yak out of my mouth. There are 2 exits from the mouth. Out the front of one’s face (the way it came in) or down the purpose built hole in the back.

We’ve been conditioned over years (27 long, dreadful years for me) that spitting is not good. Not any time, especially not all over a nice white table cloth. Secondly, we are conditioned that food goes in to the mouth via the lips and out of the mouth by the action of swallowing.

Together these conditions lead me to the mute state I find myself in now. In fact it’s only because of this mute state that I’m writing this blog for you right now. I need to communicate some how and this is the one that hurts less.

So – in terms of a loose lesson to take from this; well there’s a few ridiculous links I could make, but over all it’s about tapping in to people’s existing habits and conditioned responses to help you get the outcome you want. The ‘path of least resistance’ as some over quoted personage may have said once.